Googling By Numbers

Gather ’round folks, gather ’round. You may or you may not be shocked to hear the tidings I bring…

I regret to inform you that Haiti is out. General Larry Platt is in.

What’s that I hear you say? It can’t be possible that the deaths of what could be more than 100,000 people has already lost the attention of those who Google?

But alas it is true.

Haiti is old news. Perhaps not for the Haitians who are still trying to put together what’s left of their shattered country. But it’s no longer the concern of us Americans who have found something more EXCITING to Google.

His name is General Larry Platt and he sung a song of his of creation for the latest episode of American Idol.

The song was called Pants on the Ground and you can probably guess what the lyrics were (‘Pants on the ground, pants on the ground, looking like a fool with your pants on the ground’ and so on).

Now you can probably guess what I might angrily harp on about for the next 200 words. How could a clearly unhinged moron singing a song that sounds like it was written by a 5-year-old possibly outshine a massive natural disaster like the one that has happened in Haiti? (And seriously I’m not even exaggerating, General Platt took out the top 4 places on Google Trends today)

The number 14 search was for Hatia earthquake… that’s right…. enough people spelt Haiti wrong in their searches that it actually made it on the Hot Trend list!!

But to be honest, I don’t have the energy to harp on about how demoralising this entire situation is. I’m happy for General Platt. Pants on the Ground is a great song. Well worth the time spent Googling it.

And after all, we already know about the earthquake is Hatia, oops I mean Haiti… it’s not like anything new or exciting’s happened…

Besides Haiti doesn’t have a hilarious Youtube video to go with it. General Platt does. Check it out… you’ll die laughing…